New Life Resolutions

We’re all guilty of it. Feeling like we should come up with some crazy ass list of resolutions that inevitably fall away within the first few weeks of the year. Then we look back at them and wonder what the Hell we were even thinking in the first place.

The truth is that there’s no real reason why you should kick start a new year with resolutions. Why do you have to wait until January 1st to make changes? And why do they have to be for that year? We’re all in control of our own lives and if we want to make changes then that can happen at any time.

Saying that, it is that time of year again, so I’m going to make resolutions but I want them to be long term ones. I don’t want to get to the end of 2016 and think I haven’t achieved anything because it’s not a race. Plus that’s just setting myself up for failure and what’s the point in that?

There are plenty of things I want to do, some I NEED to do, and others that I just hope may be possible in the future some time. Some of them I know I can do and I just have to stay focused, while others I have absolutely no idea how I’ll get there. I figure if I write them down and people read them then (a) you can kick my arse every so often and (b) perhaps you’ll even have some advice for me.

So here we go: new life resolutions, not just for 2016 but beyond:

Be A Better Father

That’s not to say I find myself to be a terrible one. Trust me I’ve heard enough about bad dads to know I’m not one. I am a new one though and every single day is a learning experience. I simply want to better myself and do the best I can for my daughter. I have loved every second of having her in my life and she’s honestly the best thing to ever happen to me, and I just hope I can give her the life she deserves. I want to be able to do everything I can to make that happen.

Be A Better Husband

Again – I like to think I’m not a terrible one, but I don’t ever want to get complacent. It’s very easy to get lazy or make excuses about there not being enough time for this or that, but in the end it’s the sort of thing you just have to do and get on with it. I’m very lucky to be with someone that I love, who is a wonderful wife and an amazing mum to our daughter, and I want to be able to share all of that as a family.

Be A Better Friend

Sensing a pattern? It’s hard to explain really. A lot of the time I don’t feel like I’m the kind of friend that gets invited to hang out with people or stuff like that. Why? Maybe it’s now having a child, or maybe because of where I live or whatever else. But I don’t want it to be that way. I hope it’s not because people see me as a crap friend because I’ve always tried to care about people and be there for them. So whatever it is, I want to be able to maintain close friendships and keep those in my life that are important to me. Whether that’s those I met through conventions or online or whatever. It doesn’t matter. I just want to be the friend that they deserve.

Write More

I’m keeping this one deliberately vague. I adore writing. It comes so naturally to me and it’s something that really gives me something to channel all my thoughts and feelings into. So whether it’s blogging or reviewing or even a book – I just want to write. I’ve always felt like I have a voice and I want to be able to share it with people, and sure I enjoy doing Twitter and things like that, but I’d love to have something more focused. So if you’re after a writer or have any project ideas, do let me know!

I also have a book like this which I’m looking forward to writing in:

Capture

Lose Weight

This really comes alongside everything else. I’ve done it before and I just need to focus, and this is certainly the most long term goal I have. I want to be around for my family for a long time.

Be More Confident

I never really know how to do this one, but it’d be nice! It has been a goal of mine for as long as I can remember really..

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Forcing myself to write again..

I’ve spent the past week reading many articles and blogs in relation to World Mental Health Day. It’s a really special day which seems to encourage many people to be honest and forward with their own thoughts and emotions in a way that perhaps they wouldn’t be the rest of the time. Yes there are a few trolls but on the whole it’s an inspiring and thought-provoking day that allows people to reflect on their own lives as well as taking solace in the fact that others out there have their own problems too.

Life is like that. Sometimes it’s far too easy to assume that you’re on your own, that you’re completely strange for feeling the way you do and no one else has ever felt that way before and you’re a complete idiot. That’s certainly how I have felt over the years, that I should be dealing with things in a better way and that I should just stop worrying so much. I can only imagine how tough it was years ago before the Internet and things like it that allow sharing and researching in a discreet fashion, where people probably felt truly alone without an easy way of finding anyone else to talk to or share with.

It’s not that simple though. You can have family and friends and even strangers willing to help you and talk to you, but it’s taking that step to do so that’s often the difficult part. I spent years unemployed because I didn’t feel good enough to apply for jobs and didn’t feel confident enough to go for them, and over time that got worse and worse and many days I didn’t even want to leave the house. What was the point? I couldn’t explain that to my parents though. I couldn’t tell them that I’d never felt good enough and I had no idea why no one would ever even bother with me. Of course then I ended up with the usual accusations of being lazy and not bothering and how would I ever know unless I tried etc. Yes, all perfectly logical comments, but who’s to say that whatever is going on in my brain is logical? If it was I would probably have sorted it out a long time ago.

I’m the kind of guy who will happily walk down the road and pretend to have a conversation on my phone just to give me something to concentrate on so I’m not having to make eye contact with strangers or anything. I can have loads of friends and still manage to feel completely alone. It’s that typical loneliness at a party example – that’s me completely. No matter what happens in my life, no matter how many positive people I have in it, I still manage to feel not good enough or invisible or something negative.

It’s not even like it’s a constant depression or self-loathing. I go through phases of not thinking I’m that bad, especially compared to some people. I know I’m caring and considerate and loyal and vaguely talented in some ways, and I know I treat people as well as I can, and I’m not selfish. Yet I can easily be set off by the smallest of things and suddenly start wondering why I even bother existing. I hate letting people down. I used to live in fear of disappointing my parents and I still feel incredibly awkward any time I do something wrong, personally or in work.

What’s the root of my problems? Going right back to being mocked at school for my weight or looks or any number of things probably. You’d think I’d be able to let that go after all this time but it hangs around and it’s so difficult to detach yourself from the memory of being that person. I’m fairly good at covering it up these days and seeming confident despite being incredibly shy. You just learn to adapt. I’d love to actually BE that person though. Maybe one day. For now I remain a walking contradiction.

Five Years On

Dear Dad,

Five years. Sometimes I wonder where the time has gone. Memory is a strange thing – I probably couldn’t tell you what I had for breakfast sometime last week, but I can still remember what I bought myself from the vending machine in the hospital that day. I can still remember the smell.. the voice of the doctor.. his face.. all of it like it happened yesterday. All the stuff I’d much rather forget is unfortunately some of the most vivid memories I have.

The silence in the room.

The awkward nervous joking.

The look on everyone’s face when we were told you were gone.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that it’ll be with me forever. I don’t regret any of the choices I made that day – mostly whether I wanted to see you or not. I didn’t, not like that, and considering how much I remember everything now, I would never have wanted that to be my lasting memory of you. That wasn’t you there. I don’t think you would have wanted to be remembered in that way.

Just like I believe you made the choice to leave because you wouldn’t have wanted to live anything other than a full life. You survived at first then gave up on the way to the other hospital before getting there for an operation which was hours long. As someone who hated going to the doctors for anything minor, I can only imagine how much you would have hated that. And what would the end result really have been? I often wonder, but as much as it pains me that you’re gone, maybe you always would have been even if you’d been alive. No one deserves that.

After five years, I’m okay. I can honestly say that. I’ve got a life for myself, I’ve picked up the pieces that broke back then and they’re back together in some form or another now. I’m so thankful for everyone in my life that has got me this far. I doubt they know how important they’ve been but I really never could have done this by myself. I have an amazing wife, an extended family that have been nothing but welcoming, the best friends I could ever ask for, and mum has been incredible.

That’s the only reason I’m writing this. To let you know I’m doing good, and that while it’s never easy, I’ve learnt that it’s possible to get through the darkest periods. I know I’m strong and resilient because of you, and I’ve made something of myself. Hopefully now I’m someone you could be proud of. I know you were before, but now I hope I’m more deserving of it.

Today is just another day right? Not like I don’t miss you every other day. But today I’ll be proud of myself for a moment.

There were times I thought I’d never get through it. Where I locked myself in the bathroom and cried until my face felt like it would fall off.

I didn’t let it beat me.

David

How I fell in love with reading.. again.

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I remember vividly being encouraged by my parents and school teachers that reading was this massively important thing in my life and that I would regret it if I didn’t take the chance to learn absolutely everything about the English language possible. I was the kid that would be getting perfect marks in spelling tests each and every week, never wanting to let the side down or my parents. It was something I was proud of – being good at the English language. Even to this day I’m still incredibly picky about that sort of thing, albeit not perfect in the slightest.

The strange thing about my love for books is that it disappeared along the way. I can’t decide if it was over-analysis during English GCSEs and at A-Level but at some point it became a chore to open up a page and read what was in front of me. There was no pleasure in it, no looking forward to getting to know the characters or go on their journeys, but simply a sinking feeling inside me that I had to get the hidden meaning behind every word. Like every book was some sort of puzzle that I had to solve, trying to understand what the author was truly trying to say rather than what was simply on the page.

At some point I stopped reading completely.

Over time I became more fixated on movies or television shows. I would be focused more on the visual quick fix than taking my time with a more in-depth story in a book. Long gone were the days of loving the Chronicles of Narnia and escaping into a magical world, or laughing along with Roald Dahl. For years and years – and I’m talking over a decade at least – I never made it to the end of a book because I didn’t have the attention span for it. Some people call that an excuse but that was truly the mindset I was in at that place in my life. I had no time for drawn out stories or over descriptive narrative. I put myself in the position where I was just sticking with the shows I loved and the occasional movie.

Looking back, my excuse was the biggest load of BS imaginable. I didn’t want long, drawn out stories? Yeah, because six seasons of Lost wasn’t exactly that, was it? Breaking Bad was hardly known for its speedy story telling. Lord of the Rings wasn’t over in an hour was it? No. I’d simply convinced myself that I couldn’t love reading anymore because of my shift in focus from enjoyment to analysis, and that’s something that happened for a while with movies and TV too after my university course, but I got over that a lot quicker.

It was never that I didn’t want to read because it was considered ‘geeky’ or ‘nerdy’ – believe me, I’m up there with Team Geek all the way, representing for many years now. I’m not ashamed to fly that flag whatsoever. I actually got back into reading after someone I know got a book publishing deal. Lucy Saxon released Take Back The Skies this month and I was really inspired by everything she’s overcome to release such a book, and I really wanted to review it and see what she’d come up with. Little did I know that this would open up a whole world of opportunities for me, and now I’m reviewing books left right and center. Whether it’s for kids, teens or older, it doesn’t really matter to me as I think they all have worth in their own way, especially for a younger generation where reading is so important. It’s also wonderful how big the online community for YA and other books is, and I would have loved something like that when I was younger.

So – to the books I’ve ignored all these years, I profusely apologise. I look forward to catching up with you all in years to come. Better late than never, right?

Here’s to turning the page..

Insecurities

One of the things that really irritates me about myself is my insecurities and how they can hold me back from at least TRYING to achieve something. I remember when I came out of university and was going to all these interviews for various media positions and everyone just seemed so smart, comfortable in their roles, good looking and a million miles away from what I felt I was. If I’d ever got a job within that industry I’m not entirely sure how comfortable I would have felt, as I would have always worried about not fitting in etc.

I still feel like that now from time to time, when I attend something and see so many good looking PR people who clearly have the confidence to pull off a role like that. Sure, just like anyone else it might just be carrying it well on the outside, but it still makes me think back to that whole ‘image is everything’ way of life. I’ve often felt judged by appearance, not taken seriously and looked down on by many. It’s not a fun way to live and to this day it can still put me off from putting myself forward for things because I don’t feel worthy or that I fit the ‘mould’ so to speak.

That’s not to say that there’s necessarily a stereotypical look or style of person that has to be in these roles, as more than ever the industry seems open to taking on people that are GOOD rather than focusing completely on image. I know it’s a lot to do with how I perceive myself and the lack of being comfortable in my own skin. It’s just something I’ve felt for so many years now that it’s hard to shift away from. I see friends achieving great things and I think well maybe things are possible, but then I manage to get stuck in that fear again.

Who am I? What am I truly capable of? Sometimes it just takes someone else to see something in you for you to be able to see it too. It’s surprising how the criticism of others when you’re younger can stick with you for so long.

It’s a pain in the arse really.

Maybe one day I’ll conquer it.

I just hope it won’t be too late by then.

The naivety of ‘Celebrity’ and addiction

Whether you feel ‘celebrity’ status is justified or not, there’s no arguing against the fact that it has been an integral part of our culture for many decades now, going right back to the Golden Age of Hollywood. These were times where a face would sell movies and the stars were amongst the most popular people in the world. The Hollywood studio system knew they needed something special to obtain success, and image was everything. Over the years, ‘celebrity’ has changed, and with the technological advances in media, people are now famous for being famous, and given every opportunity to create their own fame online. ‘Celebrity’ status now has various tiers, and not only includes Hollywood stars but others who are get worldwide attention through various other means, whether it be business acumen, wealth, Royal ties, or even a more negative slant like being a mass murderer or similar. Depending on your own personal view, ‘celebrity’ and ‘fame’ could be two entirely different things.

With the intrusive nature of gossip magazines and newspapers, TV news and documentaries, and social media online, we feel closer to the celebrities than ever. In fact, with social media, we are offered the opportunity to interact with these people more than we ever have done. That chance for a reply or a favourite or a re-tweet on Twitter suddenly makes fans feel like they are important to their idol, and by learning about their latest projects or what they had for breakfast, it’s suddenly a whole new world that the celebrities are inviting us into. Yet, much like the consumption of mass media and journalism, we only get what we’re offered, and that’s something many of us forget.

The naivety of ‘celebrity’ comes from thinking we know them. How well do we really know anyone? We all know we’re capable of lies, of putting up walls and boundaries and only letting people see certain things, and that can be with friends and family. So how can we expect to know someone we’ve never met and only seen on a screen? The judgements that come every time a celebrity says or does something are fierce, coming from fans that believe they know these people better than they know themselves. This simply isn’t true – you know what they allow you to know, and what the media tells you, but in the end you don’t know them from Adam. Take Cory Monteith or the most recent tragedy of Philip Seymour Hoffman – by all means respect them as actors and as people, but even the most devout Gleek or fan of Hoffman’s work could never claim to know them.

This goes both ways, not only the naivety in supporting and defending a person, but also blindly attacking them and throwing out harsh statements like ‘f**k that junkie!’ without a second thought. As with ‘normal’ people, drug abuse and similar all have their own stories behind them, and even if these celebrities appear to have it all, it doesn’t mean they didn’t have their own demons. It’s a natural assumption to think that because they’re famous, they’ve just given in to temptation and gone down the wrong path, but in the case of Hoffman he struggled with addiction for over two decades straight out of university, and actually stayed sober through most of his fame. What tipped him over the edge again we’ll never know, but that initial decision to take drugs will always be a wrong one. Admirably he was open and honest about it, and was working constantly to fight against that addiction, yet at the end he lost that battle. That’s something very few of us can truly understand.

Hoffman’s story is tragic in a much different way to that of Monteith’s. This is a man who saved himself and went on to have many years of deserved success versus a young guy who was only just starting out and lost his battle early. Addiction often rears its ugly head in the media because of celebrities, but it’s something that is rampant worldwide and is a tragedy no matter who it happens to. I know ‘tragedy’ is perceived differently by different people, but to lose a life has to be tragic no matter what. These aren’t losses that are upsetting because of who the people were in society, but because they were taken from this world too soon. Death is never anything to revel in. Even the troubles facing someone like Justin Bieber – despite him irritating half of the population, making bad decisions and whatnot, he needs to be steered onto the right path somehow before it’s too late.

The debate will continue regardless of opinion, and actually if there’s ever one good thing to come out of these situations, it’s that people are thinking and talking. While drug addiction is arguably the most dangerous, there are many other addictions out there that people struggle with on a daily basis, and awareness is the most important thing. If it takes a ‘celebrity’ passing to bring an important issue to the masses then we must make the most of the opportunity to drive the message home – making that initial decision to take life-threatening drugs is wrong, and there has to be a better way of dealing with whatever situation you are in. No one is saying it’s easy, but nothing is ever worth killing yourself over, and that’s something we all have to keep in our minds. Life is hard, but not impossible, and there are often other options. For most people, there is always a choice to live.

The Empty Hearse

Spoilers of sorts..

Admittedly this is an article two days late, but the last thing I wanted to do was look at The Empty Hearse based on initial reaction. You see, the first ‘live’ viewing of Sherlock’s return was basically a 90 minute television orgasm. I smirked so much through the entire thing that my face was hurting after. The truth is that Steven Moffat and co could have shown 89 minutes of Mrs Hudson’s wallpaper followed by Sherlock saying ‘I’m back!’ and the majority of the fanbase would have proclaimed it the best thing in the history of the universe at that point. The overwhelming feeling was relief, as if we had all endured two years of foreplay and finally the other person had decided it was time to take the next step.

I’m not entirely sure why I’m getting all sexual with my critique – you can probably blame the time I spent on Twitter during the original airing. That didn’t help to supress the overpowering feeling of ecstasy and pleasure during the Series 3 opener. The most surprising thing was that Moffat and his co-conspirator Mark Gatiss knew exactly how we were going to react, and played to that completely with their writing. In turn we ended up with an episode that pleased the majority of the fanbase, irritated some, and perhaps even alienated more casual or new fans.

At this point it’s safe to say that Sherlock exists primarily for the hardcore fans, without worrying too much about gaining the interest of new viewers. And really, why should it? When you think about it, the majority of those involved don’t even need to be doing this. It’s clearly a show that they all do because they love working on it, and it’s a highly enjoyable thing to be a part of. Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman are killing it in Hollywood, Moffat is very busy with Doctor Who, and Mark Gatiss always seems to be juggling multiple projects, so why did they make Series 3? Obviously I’m not going to pretend BBC don’t know it’s a money spinner and popular worldwide, but it would be so easy for any of them to walk away, yet they’re still here. Maybe those interviews Freeman and Cumberbatch gave about loving the show and wanting to do it forever were true after all.

I’ve seen some critical comments about The Empty Hearse lacking in plot. I can understand that the ‘terror’ sideplot wasn’t exactly gripping; however this opener was never going to be about launching into an in-depth new plot. This was about Sherlock’s return – how he did it, why he did it, and how he manages to slip back into the world, especially with Watson. There’s more than enough to deal with emotionally without worrying too much about an actual plot, as there are so many people for Sherlock to deal with, and many different reactions. This plays out perfectly with Mrs Hudson screaming, Lestrade greeting him with a hug like old friends reunited, and then of course there’s John. That was always going to be the hardest reunion yet it is believable and heartfelt across the episode. Of course John is jubilant at his friend’s ‘not dead!’ situation, but he’s had to deal with the turmoil of loss for years now, so he’s understandably angry as well.

Sherlock has always been about a blend of comedy and drama. Even in the darkest hours with mass murderers, there was always room for a funny ringtone or something. So The Empty Hearse might amp up the comedy side with some teasing fan service, but there’s still some serious acting to be seen. Freeman especially does an exceptional job of conveying the whole range of emotions that Watson goes through, and Cumberbatch is delightful, getting to let loose as Sherlock and do some very strange and out-of-character things. Yes he’s still an over-intelligent arse at heart, but he does have a heart at least, and parents apparently!

I’ve seen a show like Doctor Who struggle with the online community over the past year or two, and in all honesty a lot of the comments have spoiled the show more than Moffat or anyone ever did. Fanbases can make or break a show, and while I’m not suggesting Who or even Sherlock are perfect, sometimes there is criticism just for the sake of it. Some people definitely hate shows before they’ve even seen them, and that’s just a crazy way to approach them. I managed to avoid Sherlock spoilers, and to go along with that ride of sheer jubilation with everyone else on Twitter was a perfect way to enjoy the opening episode. I’d never tell anyone else that they are wrong for not enjoying it, but I’m just thankful I loved it so much myself. I’m more fond of all those involved than I ever have been, with Louise Brealey, Rupert Graves and Jonathan Aris all a joy to watch, and Amanda Abbington slipping into the show like she’s been there forever.

Beyond the opener, it will be interesting to see if there are any long-term implications for Sherlock and John, and how we get to delve deeper into a new drama with the little-seen new villain. He looks like he’ll be slightly less humorous than Moriarty was. It’s hard to believe that it’ll be all over in a week or so! Yet I feel more positive about the future of the show now than I ever did, as I fully believe it’s one that will happen if and when those involved can fit it into their schedules. As much as I don’t want to wait years in between series, it’s something I’m willing to accept to keep Sherlock alive and kicking. It almost feels more special this way, not overdoing things like perhaps Doctor Who has lately. Only time will tell, but Sherlock feels more alive than ever.

Live Tweeting

Last night we saw the long-awaited return of Sherlock to UK television on BBC One. I say UK television as this was not a simulcast, and places like the United States won’t be getting the show for a few weeks. It’s unfortunate, but something that many of us are regularly a part of when it comes to US shows. We rarely get them aired at the same time, and so either have to resort to downloading ASAP, live streaming, or simply avoiding spoilers for a few days.

Is it possible to avoid spoilers? Absolutely, or at least mostly. I’ve unfollowed nearly all US actors/actresses where possible, and I generally know when not to look at my timeline. You would be surprised at the number of days I simply live on my Interactions page on Twitter, never even looking at other tweets. I’ve quit Tumblr completely because that’s a minefield, and Facebook is safe most of the time if only because most people realise it’s not exactly the place to be discussing TV shows live in detail.

‘Live tweeting’ i.e. tweeting along with comments during a live broadcast of a TV show is becoming more commonplace these days. Television networks display hashtags on-screen during a TV show, and cast members will take to Twitter to join in, discussing with the fans as well as providing tidbits about the show. It’s much like an interactive text version of a commentary you might get on a DVD/Blu-ray, and is great for the fanbase to take part in. It’s obviously a very clever piece of marketing, what with trending topics etc, but it’s also a nice reward for fan loyalty to be able to have that contact with those involved in their favourite shows.

For example, last night I was live tweeting along with #SherlockLives, and this happened:

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Now, I didn’t tweet Lou directly, so clearly she was following the hashtags etc.

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I just thought it was a nice thing to happen and I think it definitely encourages fans to stick with a show and be into it. I’m not one for chasing celebrity attention on Twitter too much, but this did make me smile. It’s the same with getting re-tweets or favourites etc. I’m really not one to beg for attention, but the hashtags are a really good way to get to meet fellow fans of something..

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The real issue comes from those who can’t watch a show live. Where does the responsibility lie in terms of spoilers..

(1) Should people NOT live tweet in case they spoil those that aren’t watching?

or

(2) Should those not watching be responsible in avoiding spoilers by staying off Twitter etc during an airing?

Obviously your feelings will likely depend on what side of the fence you fall on. Personally as there’s so many US shows I watch, I generally know when to avoid Twitter and have taken steps to avoid spoilers as much as possible. Shows like WWE Raw that heavily promote Twitter interaction mean that I’ll have to avoid my main timeline on a Tuesday until I get to see the show. Other shows don’t really get ‘spoiled’ like comedies etc, so they’re generally safe. If there’s a specific show I know I desperately do not want spoiled, I’ll take the appropriate steps as much as possible.

In terms of ‘live tweeting,’ there should definitely be an element of consideration from those doing it too. My style is generally making ‘funny’ comments or reactionary ones without being too specific. I’ll never say OMG *** DIED etc. I don’t think the majority of live tweets make any sense whatsoever unless you’re watching, so you’ll mostly be safe even if you’re not watching live, but better to be safe than sorry.

Networks do realise that people don’t want to be spoiled, so some are taking decent steps to try and avoid this happening:

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In the end, it’s really just common sense on both sides – not too specific from viewers, and taking necessary caution if you’re not a live viewer. There are valid arguments on both ends, but with this happening more often, it’s certainly something everyone should be thinking about and trying to find a happy(ish) middle ground.

Goodbye 2013

Well that flew by pretty darn quick didn’t it? Just when you think you’ve got everything under control, with plans aplenty and loads of time, it’s all over. Goodbye 2013, hello 2014. I remember sitting here back in January thinking ahead to the year and how there were certain things I wanted to do, though I’m not convinced I did any of them.

I got married so that counts for something I imagine? I hope so anyway. Seems to be going well so far, not that marriage is that much different from living together. I still get confused by the ring on my finger from time to time, and I suppose now I need to stop having casual sex all over the place. You try having the surname Bedwell and not putting it about. No, I jest. That’s really not me, it never has been and thankfully it never will be. The best way I live up to the Bedwell name these days is the amazing naps I take on weekends. I don’t have time to be an active sexy beast.

So what does 2014 have in store? No idea. Well, I know I’ll have a birthday on January 20th – not that I’m hinting for cards or presents AT ALL – and that we’ll be going to Florida in May. Beyond that, who really knows? I plan on attempting to carry on my writing for various sites and see if there’s any possible avenues I can take to expand that in some form or another. I’m not really sure what I’m doing but I like to think something will come to mind eventually.  I have contacts and friends etc, so I look forward to seeing what opportunities come up.

Hopefully this year will be a little bit cheaper than the last. A lack of wedding will help there, though Florida isn’t cheap at all so WORK CAN I HAVE A NICE BONUS PLEASE THANK YOU. I’m really looking forward to Florida as it has been a while since we’ve been, so a few different new rides as well as the awesome ones we’ve already been on = super fun time. Throw in some sunshine and a lot of food, and it’ll be a gay old time.

I suppose I’ll go to a few of those convention things I’m known for, carry on meeting cool famous people and doing some social media work. That’ll be fun. Other than that, I’ll probably play with the cats a lot, eat too much, and decide that losing weight is a good idea and fail miserably.

I might shave my beard off and stop looking like a homeless guy that has given up on life. I haven’t. I’ve just given up on shaving. The rest of my life is actually very positive.

Maybe I’ll quit my job and work in Disney World. People do that you know.

I’m not going to make any resolutions because they put too much pressure on you, and they’re generally just lies to yourself. If I truly want something to happen, I’ll just make it happen, or at least try and kick down a few doors along the way and get as close as possible.

I’ll continue to have far too many thoughts on Twitter. Mostly inappropriate.

Hopefully new friendships will continue to grow, and I’ll manage to stay in touch with my best friends I’ve had for years. I’d hate to lose those ones. Time is often an issue but I like to think we survive anything.

Talking of survival – that’s my main aim. Survive 2014 and beyond. I want to have a long and happy life if possible. I hope that’s not too much to ask.

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